Headless chicken

Today we’re going to talk about: the headless chicken

That’s you. Here’s why:

1. So sweet of you to get a balloon for Sarineh’s birthday. But why did the balloon say, “happy anniversary” ????
2. You stayed late last Friday to finish your May expenses. But you aren’t getting paid because duh, you didn’t hit the ‘submit’ button. I mean, why would you?
3. You made a huge deal about ‘saving lunch money’ and splurged on lunch prep for the week on Sunday. Your homemade salad from Monday is still sitting untouched in the fridge and you have 4 lunch receipts totaling $104 so far this week
4. You didn’t make it to so far 2 out of the 2 scheduled pilates classes. That’s $70 bitch
5. You finally made your way to the dry cleaner but left your bag of clothes at home
6. Lost your parking ticket 2x… #maxdailyamount
7. (Added) You rushed to your 5:30 Pilates class (good job) but to the wrong location

It’s really a small wonder that you have the job you have.

It’s only (already?!) Thursday… Let’s…

#losingit